I wish I was stronger.

I wish I was strong enough to control my temper, but once something angers me, I find it so hard to stop yelling, screaming and in general, being a bitch. I don't just wish I was stronger, but I need to be stronger. If I don't become stronger and learn to let go of my anger, I know with a certainty that I am just going to screw everything up so much more.

On a completely different note, I'm considering deleting my blog. I'm just not so sure that it's a good idea for me to write certain things on here and well, I haven't written all my feelings out at times when I felt like it because I'm not too keen on sounding like I constantly complain, and when I get upset, which is most nights, I tend to over think things and probably stretch some out of proportion. :S

I wished I was Anywhere But Here

I thought I was treading water, but I realised that I was wrong. I was steadily sinking, the words and emotions pulling me under. Frantically, I tried to swim back to the surface. I tried to break through; to get a breath of air. My anger began to increase, but at the same time my energy began to drain away and I discovered that I didn't want to fight anymore... I stopped struggling and let myself be dragged further down, towards the dark and gloomy ocean bed. Every so often though, I lashed out at whatever was nearby. However, the only result was my energy draining even faster than before. After some time had passed, time that felt like an eternity, my body landed on the ocean bed with barely a sound. I didn't move; just watched as everything appeared to pass me by.